Lately.......

"We all indulge in the strange, pleasant process called thinking, but when it comes to saying, even to someone opposite, what we think, then how little we are able to convey! The phantom is through the mind and out of the window before we can lay salt on" - Virginia Woolf (1882-1941) [Stephen] British Fiction Writer, CriticWell not today!

Seriously, God is AMAZING. And since yesterday (yes, if you are thinking about you, it might be), God has revealed to me true compassion. The summer seems so far away now. God is working on me soo much. These past months, I have learned so much. More than I ever knew. My faith is soo much stronger! But now, not only am I working on a part of the bible that I would never have looked at because it is extremely confusing..but its being to look clearer. But also he has laid something on my heart. My friends and family. They are so lost and I just don't get it, but I know God will point out that which I need to know. I am not sure what to do or say. What to do! Lord, I really wish I had this blueprint...some script or something....to fix all this. I know that it's all trust. I trust you Lord. Lord please help me to more real with myself and others. I know that I live for you...but I can't...... I just don't know what to say. Reveal to me what your desires are for me, Lord. They need you as much as I do. I know I am not perfect...by far I am not Jesus.. .but for some reason they ritcule you and try to fill me head with comments....they never stay. Lord, I love you more than they would ever amount to. Worshiping you, pray to you, talking to you, and just praising you is the best thing in the world.
Lord .. Jesus Christ, the faithful witness, the firstbordn for the dead, and the ruler over he kings of the earth. To Him who loved us and washed us from our sins in His own blood, And has made us kings and priests to His God and Father, to Him be glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen. -Revelations 1:5-6

As I look back on yesterday, I feel like you have done this for a reason. As you always do. But am I really ready? This is one thing I am always struggling with. Lord, please be with them. I don't get it. They know who you are. They know who Jesus is. They know he died on the Cross. What more can I say? What is there to say? I don't get it! They know you, but they don't accept you. You were denied three times yesterday, on my voicemail for that fact. You were ripped apart. I litterally just cried last night. Last night, compassion hit me. Lord Jesus I love you more than the world and I want them to know you. I want them to know you personally. You have always been there for me; You help me through it all; You hold me under your wings; You continue to grow within me; You make me just soo blessed; You have saved me; You forgive me for everything I have done. Daily I sin; daily I continue on my day with no thoughts of you; somedays I forget to pray to you; and then others.. . o.. those other days.... Those are the most beautiful days. You make the sunshine through the clouds; You make is warm even when it is snowing; You teach me new things about myself as Psalms 32:8 says "..I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will guide you with My eye..."; You cleanse me; Those are the days I praise you more. [Psalms 34:1..."I wil bles the Lord at all times: His praise shall continually be in my mouth."] Lord, as this school year continues, this summer goes one and the new school year starts, I pray you just continue to teach me Lord. Teach me what to do. I would rather you walk with me in the sand footprint by footprint, then leave me high and dry to walk the desert place by myself.

Now, I know I may get a few bad thoughts and comments, but do leave them. There are things I would rather be put up front. And if one thing, your real truely honest relationship with Jesus. How is your walk? How is your faith? How much do you trust the Lord?
God Bless,Rene Carr

PS Do know that I do love you (those for which this is intended to be for). John 13:35 says ... "...as I have loved you, so you must. By this all men will know you are my disciples, if you love one another." And do know that " all that I do, is done with love." [1 Corinthians 16:14]. I love all of you dearly and I know your reading this with no care in the wordl ; but I pray that I am wrong about you. I pray that you see what I see, know what I now know, and open your eyes to the true light. My life has been troublesome and I have been through many trials, but I look through a different light. Without God, light of the day always seemed light looking through a glass...but now that is removed and I see what the world truely is. I love you four and do know you have been in my prayers for a long time and wil continue to be in my prayers.
Please reflect on John 4:8-23John 4:24 "..'God is Spirit, and those who worship HIm must worship in spirit and truth'. The women said to Him. 'I know that Messiah is coming and when he comes he will tell us all things'. Jesus said to her, ' I who speaks to you am He'..." HE HAS LIVING WATER!! PS. I have a skit to the scene after wards.. ask later about it.
Psalms 33:13-20

13 The Lord looks fro mheaven; He sees all the sons of men.14 From the place of His dwelling He looks on all the inhabitants of the earth;15 He fashions their hearts individually; He considers all their works.16 No king is saved by the multitude of an army; a mighty man is not delivered by great strength.17 A horse is a vain hope for safety; neither shall is deliver any by its great strength.18 behold, the eye of the Lord is on those who fear Him, on those who hope in His mercy;19 To deliever their soul from death, and to keep them alive in famine.20 Our soul waits for the Lord; He is our help and our shield

Lord... what will happen in the end? I know they end is a time from now, but you never know what tomorrow brings. Reflect in Revelations if your ready for it and ask God to grant you wisdom and understanding.But I love this verse:"He who over comes shall be clothed in white garments, and I will not blot his name from the Book of Life; but I will confess his name before My Father and before His angels." - Revelation 3:5